Before you read...

I'd love to invite you to begin by listening to this week's Audio Reflection. In it, I share the story of how I first discovered the power of presence and introduce our practice for the month.

🎧 Listen to this week's Audio Reflection here. 

Many of you know pieces of my story and how I came to this work, while others may be hearing it for the first time.

Long before I taught mindful communication, I learned about presence.

It began after I lost my first love.

We met when we were eighteen and spent seven and a half years growing up together. Eventually, we made the difficult decision to separate, believing that we each needed to grow on our own. We held onto the hope that, if it was meant to be, life would bring us back together one day.

Years later, it did.

We met in New York one October evening. He had traveled from Costa Rica to visit his brother, and I happened to be back in the city after living in Madrid.

That night felt unlike anything we'd experienced before.

We talked honestly about our relationship—what had worked, what hadn't, and who we had become. At one point, we even joked that we should pretend we'd just met for the first time, leaving all of our history behind, just to see what it would feel like to know each other as we were in that moment.

For the first time in years, the future felt open again.

Four months later, on February 16, he drowned while kayaking in Costa Rica.

In an instant, everything I thought I knew disappeared.

I didn't know who I was anymore.

I didn't know what life was supposed to look like.

Grief pulled me in every direction at once.

And yet, something unexpected happened.

For the first time in my life, I experienced the present moment completely.

Before then, I don't think I even knew there was a difference between being alive and being present.

It was as though a switch had been flipped.

I woke up.

Not to an idea.

Not to a philosophy.

But to this moment.

To being here.

To being alive.

The present felt so vivid that I didn't know what to do with it.

Around that same time, I found Buddhism. I learned to meditate. I began studying mindfulness and Right Speech. Those practices gave me a way to stay connected to the wakefulness that grief had unexpectedly revealed.

Over time, I realized how easily we drift through our lives on autopilot.

We move from one meeting to the next.

One errand to another.

One child's activity to the next.

We answer emails.

We scroll.

We worry.

We plan.

And if we're not careful, life begins leading us instead of us living it.

We forget that we're here.

Presence isn't something we simply have.

It's something we cultivate.

It's a practice.

Because it's only when we're awake that we truly notice our lives.

It's only when we're awake that we can fully appreciate the people sitting across from us.

It's only when we're awake that we can laugh, create, love, and listen.

This is why presence matters so much in our conversations.

Presence isn't just paying attention.

It's putting down the phone.

It's letting go of rehearsing what you're going to say next.

It's noticing when your mind begins worrying or judging and gently returning to the person in front of you.

It's listening to understand rather than listening to respond.

It's feeling the conversation instead of thinking about the conversation.

One of my favorite teachings from the Buddha is wonderfully simple:

When hungry, eat.

When thirsty, drink.

At first glance, it seems almost too simple.

But underneath those words is an invitation to live fully in the moment we're already in.

So often we're somewhere else.

Wanting.

Planning.

Remembering.

Worrying.

When we're attached to what we hope will happen—or afraid of what might—we leave the present moment.

And when we return to the present, something softens.

This week, I'd love to invite you to practice wakefulness.

As you move through your conversations, simply notice:

When do you feel most present?

What pulls you away?

You don't need to change anything.

Just notice.

Because every moment you notice you've wandered...

...is another moment you've begun to wake up.

Take Care of Each Other,

Cynthia

This Week's Practice

This week, simply notice.

As you move through your conversations, ask yourself:

Am I here?

When you notice your mind planning, judging, worrying, or rehearsing your response, gently return to the person in front of you.

No need to change anything.

Just notice.

Again and again.

📅 Monthly Practice Circle

Our first live Monthly Practice Circle is this Wednesday, July 8 at 12 p.m. EST.

Here is the link for the Wednesday calls. This link will be used for all monthly calls.

https://us02web.zoom.us/j/81284774668

We'll spend an hour together:

🌿 A guided meditation

🌿 A reflection on this month's practice of Presence

🌿 Questions you've submitted about communication, relationships, parenting, work—or simply being human.

I hope you'll join me.

If you have a question you'd like me to explore during our time together, simply reply to this email, and I'll answer as many as I can during the call. Or click here.