I know the feeling of being exhausted by interactions and constantly feeling like you're saying the wrong thing and then getting stuck in your head for days about it.
Or starting to express yourself and then quickly backtracking on what you were saying, giving over your opinion for someone else's.
See, I used to be extremely passive aggressive, I'd shut down at any sign of confrontation or difficult conversation. I had a hard time expressing myself so that others could hear me and it felt like anytime I did get the courage to say something, I said it in the wrong way, that would lead to an argument and nothing would get resolved. Then weeks later the same conversation would come around leading to the same cycle and pattern.
There was a lot of self evaluation and judgment that kept me comparing myself to others and gave way to a lot of doubt and insecurity and anxiety in my most important relationships.
All of this was how I lived day-in-day-out for 30+ years until my whole world changed with one phone call.
The whole narrative of my life shifted when Mauricio (Mau) my first love, my best friend, the person who knew me the best in the world passed away unexpectedly in 2011.
The minute it happened, my life changed forever.
I was a blank canvas, empty.
In March 2011, I sat on the floor of my apartment in New York City, fumbling for my tissues. For months all I could do was lay or sit on my floor, cry, and blow out the pain into tissues or (most of the time) toilet paper. There I was, on my floor, when I realized nobody could come and take this suffering away. If I was going to find a way to enjoy being in the world, it was up to me to make it happen.
Out of my loss came this need, desire, to feel good, to feel cared for. But no matter how much other people tried to nurture me, they couldn’t.
Little-by-little, I realized that the only person who could take care of me, make me a priority, make me feel good, was me. I had to undo alot of what I had been taught and if I wanted to change the way I lived in the world I was going to have to change the way I interacted with it. This meant shifting the way I interacted with myself, others, and in turn the world.
If I wanted to feel more ease and peace within my relationships, it was up to me to figure out how to make that happen.
And I did.
And this is what I want to share with you.
The Kane Intentional Communication™
Training Program is for you if...
You are a high-achieving individual looking to experience more peace so that you can show up authentically in your most important relationships
You want to heal generational trauma
There have been conversations you know you need to have with your partner, children or at work and haven't
You talk yourself out of saying things at home and at work, labeling them as not important so you don’t rock the boat
You’re noticing that you’re lashing out more with those you love, getting passive aggressive or just shutting down altogether
Your relationship with your partner and children feel more distant and disconnected than ever before
You're having the same arguments and fights again and again with your family without anything getting resolved
Others at work have commented on how you're difficult to connect with and talk to
Everything feels like a chore and you’re on autopilot most days and when you’re not, you’re dreaming about leaving or moving or being anywhere other than where you are
You get panic attacks before speaking to large groups of people
You want to express yourself clearly and concisely
You want to feel confident in decision making
Are ready to be more honest and in control of your emotions
When you bring things up in meetings, you feel ignored, or that other people’s opinions matter more than yours
As I was in search to feel better in the world, I took courses, read books, went to seminars, did therapy, went to retreats and what I was finding out was that everything came back to how I communicated.
And it was one weekend meditation and writing workshop that changed my life forever. I had never meditated before, didn't know much about Buddhism, but I went because writing had always been cathartic for me. Over that weekend I learned to meditate and it was there that I was introduced to the Elements of Right Speech in Buddhism. When I heard them I knew, this was it, these were guidelines I could follow. And, then, I woke up the next day asking, how do I do this? How do I speak in a kind, honest, and helpful way, and that's how my lifestyle experiment was born.
I began to practice interacting differently with myself, which lead to showing up differently with others and my environment.
Imagine what it would be like when...
You can talk to your spouse without getting triggered, seeing red, and wanting to ask for a divorce
Your daughter gets upset with you and you don't yell back, say something hurtful, and walk away
Having a conversation at work with an important stakeholder who had been avoiding you and it ends with her asking you for more of your time to continue talking to her
Having your partner and your children and your work need you all at the same time and you navigate with calm
Having a conversation with a coworker that you typically struggle with and walking away knowing it was the most productive conversation you've had with her in nearly five years
You no longer need to control everything and everyone in your department.
What if you could shift from overwhelm to ease in your most important relationships without compromising who you are?
Bari on being skeptical but trusting to join the training program
Lindsey on what has changed in her relationship with daughter since the training program
Vicky on deciding to join the training program
INTRODUCING
The Kane Intentional Communication™ Training Program
A group coaching program for high achieving individuals who are ready to experience more peace so they can show up authentically in their most important relationships.
A group coaching program where we help you:
- speak your truth even if you’re scared of the reaction
- improve your relationships even if you feel it's impossible for things to be different
- control your emotions even if you've been lead by them for 50+ years
- become confident in decision making even if you don't know what you want or need right now
- express yourself fully even if you don't think you can control your emotions
The training is for those who are ready to:
stop being passive aggressive, lashing out, shutting down, or taking things personally in their marriage, relationships with their children and at work
speak to their colleagues, employers, employees with more confidence and authenticity
become more present with their children in their day-to-day interactions
stop feeling trapped in the same conversation loop with their partner
quiet the anxious thoughts and constant rumination
start asking for and receiving what they need in their most important relationships
show up in the way they want to for their partner, family, friends, children.
get clarity, make decisions and have difficult conversations easily
How to stop ruminating and beating yourself up for every little thing
How to be present with others and minimize distractions
How to speak consciously, concisely and clearly and express yourself so that others can hear you
My bestselling books, How to Communicate like a Buddhist, Talk to Yourself like a Buddhist, How to Meditate like a Buddhist, and the Kane Intentional CommunicationTM Training workbook
The power of silence and how it can help you become more connected and intimate with yourself and others
How to navigate difficult conversations and interactions with ease and grace
Weekly group coaching calls with your instructor where you discuss the lessons, challenges, celebrations, and your experience with the practice
Monthly group coaching call with Cynthia
Four 1:1 Milestone Calls with your instructor throughout the training
Private community group to connect with other students and ask questions, share intentions and get the support you need
Access to all video lessons and downloads, and over 25 meditations specific for communication
NOW YOU HAVE A CHOICE TO MAKE
Do It Yourself And Continue to be
Frustrated by the way you're interacting with those you love and those you don't even know. And frustrated that you can't change this negative communication loop
Struggling to keep your emotions in check with your children and at work, unable to not take things personally, get defensive, lash out, shut down, or get passive aggressive
Feeling numb. Things your partner says or does doesn't bother you anymore, because you've chosen to ignore them, not feel them, and move on
Disconnected from your partner, friends, colleagues, but also yourself. Wondering where you've gone all these years and if it's possible to find your voice again
Anxious and fearful to have conversations with your partner, kids, sister, brother, and general worry about life. The world doesn't feel like such a friendly place
A lot of negative loops in your mind. Self judgment and judging others over where you are in life, career, relationships
Feel unappreciated at home, misunderstood at work, invisible in your interactions with family. Very indecisive in most situations- where the needs of your colleagues, partner, friends come before your own
Avoid conflict with your partner, children, colleagues at all costs. Scared to have difficult conversations
Let Us Help So You Can Experience
Calm and relaxed conversations with your partner. No longer worried about what to say and how to say it
Confidence in expressing your wants and needs clearly and concisely at home and at work so the other person or group can hear it
No longer being gripped by the fear of expressing yourself and your needs to your family and supervisors
More connection and intimacy in your personal relationships
More clear on your wants and needs within interactions at work
What it's like to take care of yourself and navigate confrontation with your children, partner, or siblings
More joyful and intentional with your family and friends
More self-compassion and less self-evaluation and judgment. Less doubt and mental chatter that paralyzes you with fear and worry
What its like to no longer gossip about others at work or compare yourself to others success
Difficult conversations as essential conversations with your partner
Being capable of getting your needs met and setting and sticking to boundaries at home and at work
Much more space in the body and mind, opening you up to more possibility
When does the training begin and end?
Do I get lifetime access to the training material?
What is the time commitment per week?
Do I get support, community or 1:1 coaching?
Cynthia Kane is the CEO of the Kane Intentional CommunicationTM Institute, LLC, the leading communication institute for high achieving individuals that provides a holistic approach to effective communication.
Cynthia uses her proprietary process called the Kane Intentional Communication PracticeTM to help her students experience more peace so that they show up authentically in their most important relationships.
She is the bestselling author of How to Communicate like a Buddhist, Talk to Yourself like a Buddhist, and How to Meditate like a Buddhist, and was named by Yahoo as the #2 Communication Coach to watch in 2021.
She and her work have been featured in national and international publications including Spirituality & Health Magazine, Self Magazine, Thrive Global, Authority Magazine, The Washington Post, Woman’s Day, BBC Travel, Refinery29, Mind Body Green and more. She has been a featured mindfulness and meditation expert on Great Day Washington, Good Morning Arizona, Good Morning Connecticut, and All About Women – WENG RADIO. Podcasts she’s been featured on: Gold with Jeanette Schneider, Inner Light Project, What Matters Most, The Lit Up Lightworker, Mindful Communication, TheFutur, Sexy Soulful Success, Office Hours.
Cynthia has a Bachelor of Arts degree from Bard College and a Master of Fine Arts degree from Sarah Lawrence College. She lives in Washington, DC, with her husband and two little kiddos.
